How to Calm Anger with Deep Breathing — Concrete Steps to Settle Down

When you feel strong anger, you may notice your chest churning and your breath turning shallow and fast. Anger and tension are said to be deeply connected to breathing. That's exactly why consciously steadying disturbed breath has been described as a handhold for easing a heightened mood. Needing no special tools and being available anytime, anywhere is the good thing about deep breathing.

Why steadying the breath makes it easier to settle

When you feel anger, the body naturally tenses, and breathing tends to become shallow and fast, it's said. This shallow breathing is thought to make a heightened state easier to sustain.

So consciously slowing and steadying the breath is described as loosening the body's tension and making the mood a little easier to settle. How much you feel it varies from person to person, but the simple act of "steadying the breath" gives one dividing point to a stormy heart.

Concrete steps to settle down

There's no set right answer to how, but here's one guide. First, whether sitting in a chair or standing, drop the tension from your shoulders. Next, breathe in slowly through your nose over about 4 seconds. Feeling your belly expand at this point is said to be even better.

Then exhale thin and long through your mouth over about 6 to 8 seconds. The point is "making the exhale longer than the inhale." Repeat this a few times, within a range that isn't uncomfortable. Since the numbers are only a guide, go at your own pace. Try to feel your stiffened shoulders and chest loosen, little by little, along with the breath you let out.

When breathing alone won't settle it

Even with deep breathing, anger won't necessarily vanish cleanly. That's because breathing is a handhold for putting a beat into the intensity, not a method for erasing the emotion itself.

When breathing alone won't settle it, it's said to help to combine methods — stepping away from the spot for a moment, walking a little, or writing out your feelings on paper or in an app. Yurusen's step of "filing" someone into a ledger is one way to set outside, and let go of, the feeling that remains after you've caught your breath. It's reassuring to keep a few ways of settling that suit you.

When the distress lasts

If irritation or a racing heart just won't settle, and such a state continues long enough to disrupt daily life, don't carry it through breathing alone — consider consulting a professional such as a psychosomatic clinic or counselor. Deep breathing is one easy, reliable tool for handling your own heart and body with care.

Related themes are also touched on in the wraith codex.