I'm So Tired: Writing to Sort It When Your Heart Is at Its Limit

You're tired of it all. Of trying, of holding back, of hoping — and though you can't quite explain why, a voice leaks up from the bottom of your heart: "I've reached my limit." Unlike physical tiredness, this heavy fatigue barely lifts even after sleep, and it slowly covers your days.

Feeling "so tired" is not because you're weak. More than that, it's a sign that a heart which has kept on trying is asking for rest. This article shows how to write out what lies behind that feeling, sort it, and feel a little lighter without blaming yourself.

"I'm so tired" is a sign your heart is nearing its limit

The sense of being "so tired" is not something that vanishes with a change of attitude. In most cases it's a sign that your heart is nearing its limit. When overstrain, repeated holding-back, and a lack of rest continue, your heart wears down just as your body does, until it can't put out its strength.

Physical fatigue recovers with sleep, but the fatigue of the heart is hard to lift by sleep alone. That's exactly why, if you ignore the voice saying "I'm so tired" and keep running, the fatigue piles up all the deeper. Acknowledging that voice — "of course I'm tired" — is where it starts.

Don't deny "I'm tired"; write it out as it is

When you feel so tired, many people put a lid on the feeling, thinking, "I mustn't whine over something like this." But suppressed fatigue doesn't disappear; it gains weight inside. So try writing out the tired feeling without denying it.

"Tired from constantly minding others." "Tired of trying and never being recognized." "Tired because I can't see the way ahead." Take out each tired scene and what you felt in it, one at a time. Written out and lined up, what is draining you most comes into view. Just having the true form split into a few parts gives your vague heaviness something to hold onto.

Stop trying, and give yourself permission to rest

What an exhausted heart needs is not to try even harder, but to stop and rest. Yet the more earnest a person is, the more they drive themselves with "I mustn't rest." Now is a time when you may loosen that grip.

When you review the fatigue you wrote out, try giving yourself permission to rest: "I'm this drained, so of course I should rest." Just writing "I'm so tired," as it is, somewhere no one else sees, lets a little of the weight you're holding out. As far as you can — sleep, cut back on plans, make time to do nothing — securing even one small rest lets you breathe a little easier.

When the pain goes on, don't carry it alone

Fatigue is something many people feel, but when "I'm so tired" piles up and grows strong enough that you feel like disappearing or vanishing, please don't shoulder it alone. A professional such as a psychosomatic clinic, or a support line, can help. In Japan, the Yorisoi Hotline (0120-279-338) and Inochi no Denwa are available; elsewhere, look for a local crisis or mental-health line.

Writing "this is hard," just as it is, in a place no one else sees, can be a small step before asking for that help. There's no need to wrap it up positively or to pin down the cause. As you simply let it out, the outline of the fatigue gradually appears, and the weight you carry grows lighter.

Related: A Persistent Feeling of Emptiness. Writing to See the Hole in Your Heart